One step closer

Well, not a whole lot going on right now.  We finished the legal papers and I am all legally cleared and ready to go.  I think the guys are too.  I think the only thing we are waiting on is for the egg donor (A's sister) to get her screening and stuff done then we can start the meds and do the transfer.  Hopefully that won't take too much longer b/c I can't wait to be pregnant again.  I am hoping for twins.  I have always wondered what it would be like to carry twins and feel like b/c of my large stature that it is something I would be able to do pretty easily.  I guess we'll see though.
Zoe went to the dermatologist about a week or two ago and her skin has been doing so much better.  I was amazed at how fast it healed.  I could already tell a difference the next day and after 3 days her eczema was almost gone.  Within a week she was completely cleared up.  The dermatologist gave her 2 Rx creams and an oral Rx antihistamine.  As far as the Rx the pediatrician had given us, the dermatologist said they don't recommend giving that to small children.  Thank god I hadn't been using it much.  I just didn't like putting it on her b/c of all the steroids and stuff it has in it and would only put it on the really bad spots for a few days to a week then wouldn't use it again for the rest of the month.  When her eczema started getting really bad I just stopped using it b/c there was no way I was going to use that much on her b/c she was broke out all over her body.

Paperwork!!!

Yay!!!  I never thought I would be so happy to get some paperwork.  Everything is going great.  We got the first set of legal papers.  The fall weather is here and it has been awesome outside.  Perfect temperatures and no rain.  I have been trying to keep myself busy with getting ready for Halloween and all the fairs and fall festivals coming up.  Can't wait!  Summer is my favorite time of year but I am loving this fall weather, for now. 

When we were playing outside on the swing set the other day (me and the kids) Alyssa got scared by a spider and fell off the swing set.  It was the top floor of their wooden swing set so it's pretty high.  She's ok but it shook her up pretty bad.  She couldn't stand up afterwards, her legs were like limp noodles and I took her in the house and she kept saying she wanted to go to bed.  I knew it probably wasn't a good idea to let her go to bed after just falling like that in case she had hit her head so I kept checking on her and she was getting hotter and sweatier then she started throwing up.  It was all very stressful but thankfully she is fine. 

Zoe is broke out in a terrible rash and it is driving me, and her, nuts.  The pediatrician says that it's just eczema but I don't know.  This goes from her toes all the way up to her neck.  The cream they gave me just isn't working and it is the strongest thing they can give me.  I have an appointment scheduled for her to see a dermatologist next week and it can't come soon enough.  She will scratch and scratch until her skin is raw and bleeding and she will be crying and fussing about it and she just keeps on scratching.  It's terrible!

This is taking FOREVER!!!

Ok, I know they say that patience is a virtue but apparently it is a virtue that I don't have.  I can't believe how slow the time seems to be going by.  I guess it's just b/c there isn't anything for me to do but wait.  I feel like I should be doing something, anything.  I have talked to the guys a little more and talked to A's sister a little on FB.  She is the one that is going to be donating the eggs.  She seems incredibly nice and I hope I get to meet her.  The more I talk to them and get to know them and their family the more I love them and the more of a connection I feel with them.  They really are great people and I am truly honored to be doing this surrogacy for them.  I have heard other surrogates say that with a surrogate pregnancy you tend to get more attached to the family than you do to the baby.  I know I'm not pregnant yet and I still have a long way to go but that feels so true.

Just waiting

Well nothing new going on yet.  We are "officially" matched with the guys.  Yay!!!  So now we are just waiting on they guys to go through all their medical screenings and A's sister also.  And we should be getting started on the legal paperwork soon also.  I can't wait to get started.  I can't wait to be pregnant again.  I'm thinking we are gonna get twins hopefully on the first try (fingers crossed).  When we went to the match meeting they said that it usually takes about 4 months from the time you meet each other to the time they actually do the transfer.  I am hoping that it doesn't take that long.  4 months seems like forever.  Hopefully it will fly by (fingers still crossed).

Match Meeting

Well, we flew out to L.A. on Friday and met the guys.  They were great.  Very nice, great sense of humor.  I can't wait to start this journey with them.  The match meeting lasted about an hour and we just talked basicly about ourselves and why we chose surrogacy and all the other basic stuff that was already in our profiles.  Then we left and they did an excellent job of showing us around the city since they live in L.A.  They took us to see the Hollywood stars and we got lots of pictures.  Then they took us up the mountain to this great spot so that I could get a good picture of the Hollywood sign.  It was beautiful up there, you could see all the way to the city, but the road to get there was ridiculous.  It was very narrow and very curvy and there are cars parked all over the sides of the road.  I don't see how people live on those roads, that would drive me nuts.  I guess that's why most of the people over there drive little cars.  There's no way I could have done it in my Explorer especially if there was another car coming the other way.  Then they took us out to eat at a very good Italian restaurant.  I eat chicken parm all the time, that's usually what I get at Italian restaurants.  This was the best chicken parm I have ever had!  It was delicious.  After dinner they took us back to the hotel.  Tommy and I ended up going up to the Groove that night and eating at the Cheesecake Factory since we didn't get to last time.  OMG it was amazing!  We only went up there for desert b/c we thought that was all they had and we had already at dinner.  Turns out they have a FULL menu.  They have pizza, pasta, salads, burgers, steaks, burritos, seafood and everything in between, plus a full bar and of course plenty of cheesecake.  I got the carrot cake cheesecake and OMG...heaven!  I am a big carrot cake lover and this was just the best cheesecake ever.  We ended up going back the next day for lunch and I got the white chocolate macadamia nut cheesecake and Tommy had the snickers cheesecake.  They were both very good but still not as good as my carrot cake cheesecake.  So after lunch we went to the Santimonica Pier.  It was beautiful.  The beach was huge, much bigger than the beaches in Florida that I've been to and the sand was much softer, not as full of shells.  But it was also harder to walk on b/c you sink into it when you walk.  I felt like I need snow shoes on.  And the water was freezing.  I was not expecting that.  S said it's always like that, it's b/c the water comes down from Alaska.  We hung out at the pier for a while and looked all around and ate dinner at Bubba Gumps Shrimp Co which was delicious.  I got the fish and chips but their fish and chips was Mahi Mahi, not cod or flounder or something like that like it is here.  After dinner we went back to the airport and came home.  It is a long, butt numbing ride and I was in the middle of the plane both times.  I hated it.  It was the first time I have ever not been by the window.  It made me a little dizzy and nauseous not being able to see out the window.  Next time they are scheduling my flight I will make sure they get me a window seat.

The Talk

Ok, so I talked to my mom and dad yesterday for the first time since I told them about which couple I decided to go with.  When I told my dad the other day he was completely freaking out but he's fine now.  I wrote him a letter the other day telling him about the couple and why I chose them and all that good stuff and I sent him a copy of the guy's profile so I guess that helped.  I think he was just really in shock after I told him but he's calmed down now and had time to process everything so he's ok.  My mom on the other hand is still mad about it but she's not the type to scream and yell and cuss like my dad (thank god).  She just doesn't understand why I chose them and I tried to explain it to her but it seems to just go in one ear and out the other.  Oh well, I guess one out of two ain't bad.  Hopefully mom will come around to the idea sooner or later.  I am still not planning on telling anyone else that we are going with a gay couple.  I have just decided to save myself the headache b/c you never know how people are going to react.  We are flying out to L.A. on Friday to meet the guys and I can't wait.  Hopefully we will get to spend a good bit of time with them while we are there.  I would like to be able to meet some of their family also.  They live in L.A. so hopefully that won't be a problem.  I would also love to be able to go to the beach this time while we are over there and actually do more than just sit in a hotel room then fly back early the next morning.

Don't know how I'm going to do this

God give me the strength to do this.  I told my dad about the surrogacy and that I am going with a gay couple and he FREAKED out!  There was a lot of cussing and disbelief before he hung up on me.  But the part that hit me the hardest was when he said that he was actually proud of me until he heard that and that he definately wouldn't be repeating it or telling anyone.  He thinks I have completely lost my mind.  If this is how people are going to act when I tell them, I don't plan on telling anyone else.  :'(  I know in my heart that this is the right thing.  I don't know why people are so judgemental.  I just want to move far far away from everyone right now.